Past Present Puture.*

Did you know that no one I know in my real life reads this blog? So theoretically it could all be a load of bollocks and none of you would know any better! Well, OK one reader that I know of has had email contact with me, but none of my real life friends of family even knows I blog.

I like it most of the time because I can be myself without thinking too much about who might be reading.

But today I gave the link to a good friend of mine. We live in separate countries now, and I miss that we can’t just pop over for a coffee. I’ve never met her husband or her two children and she last saw me on my wedding day. But, she’s a loyal friend, and whenever we connect it’s alway easy conversation and frequent laughs.

We first became friends at primary school. We lived nearby and used to catch the same bus to and from school. (It was bus number 640 when I first started catching the bus aged about 7 I think and later changed to bus number 246. Strange that I still remember that.) Towards the end of primary school we spent more time together and I would visit her house to play. I remember how we used to build cubby houses. I remember her swing set, her lovely room and one rather embarrassing incident when I hit her father over the head with a doll. (I’m cringing now just thinking about it. )

We attended different high schools and had little contact until we’d both left school and found ourselves both studying nursing at the same university. That renewed a long lasting friendship.

Oh how we could talk. We laughed until our faces were red and tears ran down. We used to meet and walk along the beach together. (That remains one of my favourite places in the whole world to this day.) As nurses, we shared a peculiar and somewhat graphic sense of humour. A favourite running joke came from the pages of the Mosby’s Medical and Nursing dictionary. (*The P pages if you must know.)

Once we went on a road trip for a weekend to the Flinders Ranges. We made ridiculous jokes and took photos and saw beautiful parts of our great country. I think we both knew that we were making special memories on that trip. I laugh now when I remember that after so much exercise that weekend traipsing all over the ranges, we both decided to buy bikes to get fit. So that very week I think it was we both bought bikes and used to meet to ride along the esplanade. We did in fact get quite fit.

I think we suspected that we would go separate ways in life. Both of us were keen travellers and although we never travelled abroad together, we talked of our adventures and places we’d been or wanted to go. Once I’d met D and foresaw a future together it was a given that I’d be leaving Australia and the poor girl had to endure my ramblings about him, and what he’d said and what I’d said and blah blah….you know all that romantic stuff. (After all, it was a long distance romance… I had to talk to someone about it!)

Since we have gone separate ways, (she has also left home town and married a foreigner and is now living in another place) life has taken on a much more serious tone. We’ve both had children while away from family support. She has faced health issues. We’ve both had to learn to carve out a new life in a new place.

Life has been harder than I expected since those days. We talked of our futures with sparkles in our eyes and the naivete of youth. Idealists, we dreamed of fairy tale weddings, and babies and love. We’ve each been blessed with these things, but I don’t think either of us expected the real world to be so hard at times. In our dreams we forgot the realities of washing piles, sleepless nights, loneliness and the hard work and worry of look after sick children.

But you know what? We’ve grown. We’ve grown in maturity, wisdom and character. I wouldn’t go back to those girlish days. Yes, it was fun. Yes we were blissfully happy, but life is good. We have beautiful children and good husbands, and are living the life of adventure we dreamed about.

These days are precious my friend. We’ll too soon look back and remember them with fondness.


6 thoughts on “Past Present Puture.*

  1. So theoretically it could all be a load of bollocks…
    no jokes, i was just thinking about this last night, not in reference to you, but how seriously i take my Virtual Friends :)
    ewwww that does sound *stalky* (stalkerish??? stalky sounds cuter)
    and i guess it says something about my naïvété…

    and i was just saying to a Real Life (lol) friend a few days ago that i have no idea where my two bridesmaids are: i would love to make contact again, we live such different lives: i started having babies about ten years before they did, so that always makes for a change in friendship…
    loved reading your thoughts X

  2. The internet is weird though because some people whom I feel like I know quite well (because they share their lives in a blog for example) don’t know me from a bar of soap. Also, often because there are no real life situations, the nature of relationships isn’t very clear. You don’t really know whether to refer to someone as a friend, or just as “you know xxxxx whose blog I read”.

    It’s a shame to lose contact with people, but as you say…..times change and people’s lives become very different.
    Righto. I’m waffling now.

  3. i love karen(of the random mind)’s hubby’s phrase:
    Virtual Friend
    and yeah, i wonder: one day someone who reads my blog/chats on forum with me will see me across the park and yell:
    and i’ll *cringe* and think:
    who the heck is that????

  4. oh, and yes, my international VF’s are known to hubby as *you know, sarah who makes the bags* and *you know, barb the evil genius who sent me that coffee from starbucks* and *you know, lizard from my art blog*
    strange, very strange.
    i must have something to do other than clog up your comments, just read your helicopter post:
    oh em gee, i’m giggling down/over here, next time get the Huge Spa Towel within reach of the bath X

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