It seems I only post here when there’s something bothering me. In between times, I’m a pretty happy person.
I’m missing people tonight.
I’m feeling misunderstood, out of my depth and wishing I could have a good, hearty conversation with people about the things that are often on my mind. What is this thing in me that really doesn’t want to be misunderstood? Whatever it is, it keeps me silent quite a bit. I won’t comment for fear of being labelled or categorised by it and it would take much conversation and discussion to explain my position. And most of the time I don’t even have a position. I’m always learning, always thinking and growing and exploring new ideas. I hate the thought that if I say something people will put stick a label on me and file me in a particular category, there to ever remain in their minds.
I don’t like boxes, labels, camps. I don’t like it that if I believe a certain thing people assume I belong to a particular category. Can’t I belong to my own category? An eclectic mix of all the things I believe and understand? Sure, some of them might contradict each other, but I don’t mind.
On the one hand I am Traditionalist, Capitalist, Fundamental. Christian. Creationist. Conformist.
On the other hand I am not. Parts of me are Feminist, Socialist, Universalist, Spiritualist. Non-conformist.
Sometimes I am Agnostic. Evolutionary. Revolutionary. Anathema. Rebel. Philosopher.
I might just sound confused. But don’t misunderstand me. I’m not confused, I’m just learning and growing and don’t want to stay in the confines of a box, group, label, camp or category. Is that ok?